Using the Law of Attraction for Improving Your Relationships

Many people, who have learned about the law of attraction, are having difficulty applying it in their day-to-day lives. How the Law of Attraction (LOA) is explained is that it is a universal law, like the law of gravity. It affects all of us whether we are aware of it or not. The teachings are that if we are more consciously aware of how we attract the positive and negative circumstances in our lives, we will then have more power and control over attracting the things we want and reducing the amount of things we don't want.

This is all true. However, I have found that there is a gap between understanding how the law works intellectually and being able to apply it in our own daily lives. I will be using this article to give you a few tips and tools on how to apply this law into your own lives and use it to improve your relationships.

Let's start off with an example. Let's say you just had a fight with your teenage son. You feel he is being rude and difficult. He never listens and doesn't seem to appreciate all the things you have done for him. He is lazy and gives you a hard time whenever you ask him to do something. Sound familiar?

If your goal would be to improve your relationship with your son, this would NOT be the time to discuss your feelings with him. According to the LOA, whatever emotions you are feeling right now, will attract similar emotions in those around you. So if you are feeling angry, your son will also, likely, respond similarly. Not a great atmosphere to resolve conflicts. So what do you do?

If you want to have a positive discussion, you need to be in a positive frame of mind. I know this is not easy to do, but it is the only way that will work. You need to take some time to calm down, count to 10 or take a few deep breaths, listen to music or go for a walk. On a scale of 0 – 10, with 0 being no frustration or anger and 10 being enraged, you need to be a 3-4 for this to be successful. Another way to get into a better place could be to remember your son at a better time, when the relationship was more harmonious. It could even be when he was a baby or a little boy. As you write down all the things you loved about him when he was small, your feelings should change.

For example you can write:

  • I remember his smile
  • I remember how delicious he smelled after a bath
  • I remember how sweet he was
  • I remember how easy he was to please
  • I remember him running to me and hugging me

Even though these thoughts are in the past, if you stay with them, you will be softer about your son now. Once you find yourself calmer, gauge your feelings on the scale again, when you get down to 3-4, now is the time to have that talk with him.

How about an example with your partner? Let's say your partner has just criticized you for something. You are upset and feel unfairly treated. Most people have a few ways of reacting. They will either withdraw and sulk, or confront and become angry. Neither of these choices is effective in resolving conflict and creating harmony in your relationship and you will probably attract just more of the same.

Again the challenge, and it is a challenge when you are feel hurt or unheard, is to find a positive thought about your partner. Now, you might be saying to yourself, "How can I feel positive about my partner when he has just hurt my feelings". You are right, it is hard, but it is what you have to do if you want to change the negative energy existing between the two of you.

Another tool that can help you get up the scale, can be to distract yourself completely from the problem. Don't think about your partner. Instead watch a comedy show or sports, exercise, pet your cat, or go see a movie. Once your mind is off the issue, you should feel some relief and distance and that would help change your mood and attract a better outcome. Try it and let me know how it works!

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