Many people talk about self-esteem, needing it, having it and raising it. For some, it isn't really clear what self-esteem really means, so I have decided to write this article clarifying it to you as well as giving you a quiz so you can determine where you fall on the scale.
Self-esteem is a way of thinking, feeling, and acting that implies you accept, respect, trust and believe in yourself. Self-esteem means that you have confidence that you can fulfill your deepest personal needs, aspirations and goals. It comes from within where you see yourself as a worthy, secure person who feels capable and able to handle whatever challenges may arise. Your self-esteem is developed at a very early age and it was your parents and caregivers who were the primary influence for how you developed your self-esteem. As an adult, however, it is up to you how long you continue to hold onto those childhood tapes in your mind vs how much you work to improve and reject those negative influences and distorted beliefs Self-esteem is seen as being elastic, in that it can be increased or decreased at any time in your life, depending on your own life experiences, how you perceive these experiences, what you learn from them and how it affects what you tell yourself.
Self-esteem is largely affected by what you tell yourself. The average person thinks 80,000 thoughts per day. Most of those thoughts are negative and most of them are the same thoughts they had yesterday and last year. What you say to yourself does affect your self-esteem whether you are conscious of these thoughts or not. How you rate yourself on the quiz is also an indication of how many negative vs. positive thoughts you are thinking on a daily basis. You might want to ask yourself what is it costing you to stay at this level? The only thing you know for sure is that self-esteem cannot improve as long as these negative thoughts are predominant in your mind.
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